Grammar & Usage · Source
Consider this statement by Louis Bromfield, a noted author: “If I, as a novelist, wrote dialogue for my characters which was meticulously grammatical, the result would be the creation of a speech which rendered the characters pompous and unreal.”
And this one by Jacques Barzun, former literary critic for Harper’s: “Speech, after all, is in some measure an expression of character, and flexibility in its use is a good way to tell your friends from the robots.”
Consider also this puckish remark by the late Clarence Darrow: “Even if you do learn to speak correct English, who are you going to speak it to?”
These are typical reactions of professional people to the old restrictions of formal English grammar. Do the actual teachers of English feel the same way? Again, some typical statements:
“Experts and authorities do not make decisions and rules, by logic or otherwise, about correctness,” said E. A. Cross, then Professor of English at the Greeley, Colorado, College of Education. “All they can do is observe the customs of cultivated and educated people and report their findings.”
“Grammar is only an analysis after the facts, a post-mortem on usage,” said Stephen Leacock in How To Write. “Usage comes first and usage must rule.”
One way to discover current trends in usage is to poll a cross section of people who use the language professionally, inquiring as to their opinion of the acceptability, in everyday speech, of certain specific and controversial expressions. A questionnaire I prepared recently was answered by eighty-two such people—thirty-one authors, seven book reviewers, thirty-three editors, and eleven professors of English. The results, some of which will be detailed below, may possibly prove startling to you if you have been conditioned to believe, as most of us have, that correct English is rigid, unchangeable, and exclusively dependent on grammatical rules.
As you read each sentence below, pay particular attention to the italicized word or words. Decide whether the sentence is RIGHT or WRONG as a matter of current educated usage, then click to reveal the answer.
1. Californians boast of the healthy climate of their state.
RIGHT. There is a distinction, says formal grammar, between healthy and healthful. A person can be healthy—if he possesses good health. But climate must be healthful, since it is conducive to health. This distinction is sometimes observed in writing but rarely in everyday speech, as you have probably noticed. Even the dictionaries have stopped splitting hairs—they permit you to say healthy no matter which of the two meanings you intend. “Healthy climate” was accepted as current educated usage by twenty-six of the thirty-three editors who answered the questionnaire, six of the seven book reviewers, nine of the eleven professors of English, and twenty of the thirty-one authors. The earlier distinction, in short, is rapidly becoming obsolete.
2. Her new novel is not as good as her first one.
RIGHT. If you have studied formal grammar, you will recall that after a negative verb the “proper” word is so, not as. Is this rule observed by educated speakers? Hardly ever. Author Thomas W. Duncan remarked: “I always say—and write—as, much to the distress of my publisher’s copyreader. But the fellow is a wretched purist.” The tally on this use of as showed seventy-four for, only eight against.
3. We can’t hardly believe it.
WRONG. Of the eighty-two professional people who answered my questionnaire, seventy-six rejected this sentence; it is evident that can’t hardly is far from acceptable in educated speech. Preferred usage: We can hardly believe it.
4. This is her.
WRONG. This substitution of her where the rule requires she was rejected by fifty-seven of my eighty-two respondents. Paradoxically enough, although “It’s me” and “This is me” are fully established in educated speech, “This is her” still seems to be condemned by the majority of cultivated speakers. Nevertheless, the average person may feel a bit uncomfortable saying “This is she”—it sounds almost too sophisticated. This is more than an academic problem. If the voice at the other end of a telephone conversation makes the opening move with “I’d like to speak to Jane Doe,” you are on the horns of a very real dilemma. “This is she” may sound prissy—“This is her” may give the impression that you’re uneducated. The English language is just deficient enough not to be of much help.
5. Who are you waiting for?
RIGHT. Formal grammar not only requires whom but demands that the word order be changed to: “For whom are you waiting?” (Just try talking with such formality on everyday occasions and see how long you’ll keep your friends.) Who is the normal, popular form as the first word of a sentence, no matter what the grammatical construction; and an opinion by Kyle Crichton, a well-known magazine editor, is typical of the way many educated people feel. Mr. Crichton says: “The most loathsome word (to me at least) in the English language is whom. You can always tell a half-educated buffoon by the care he takes in working the word in. When he starts it, I know I am faced with a pompous illiterate who is not going to have me long as company.” The score for acceptance of the sentence as it stands (with who) was sixty-six out of eighty-two.
6. Please take care of whomever is waiting.
WRONG. Whomever is awkward and a little silly in this sentence and brings to mind Franklin P. Adams’ famous remark on grammar: “‘Whom are you?’ asked Cyril, for he had been to night school.” It is also contrary to grammatical rule. People who are willing to be sufficiently insufferable to use whomever in this construction have been tempted into error by the adjacent word of. They believe that since they are following a preposition with an objective pronoun they are speaking impeccable grammar. In actuality, however, whomever is not the object of the preposition of but the subject of the verb is waiting. Preferable form: Please take care of whoever is waiting.
7. Whom would you like to be if you weren’t yourself?
WRONG. Here is another and typical example of the damage which an excessive reverence for whom can do to an innocent person’s speech. Judged by grammatical rule, whom is incorrect in this sentence (the verb to be requires who); judged by normal speech patterns, it is absurd. This use of whom probably comes from an abortive attempt to sound elegant.
8. My wife has been robbed.
RIGHT—if something your wife owns was taken by means of thievery. However, if your wife herself was kidnapped, or in some way talked into leaving you, she was stolen, not robbed. To rob is to abscond with the contents of something—to steal is to walk off with the thing itself. Needless to say, both forms of activity are highly antisocial and equally illegal.
9. Is this desert fattening?
WRONG. The dessert that is fattening is spelled with two s’s. With one s, it’s a desert, like the Sahara. Remember the two s’s in dessert by thinking how much you’d like two portions, if only your waistline permitted.
Key grammar and usage rulings from this intermission, based on a survey of 82 language professionals.
9 usage entries
The old distinction—healthy = possessing health, healthful = conducive to health—is rapidly becoming obsolete. Modern dictionaries permit healthy for either meaning. Accepted by 61 of 82 professionals surveyed.
Formal grammar once required so (not as) after a negative verb: “not so good.” This rule is almost never observed by educated speakers. Accepted 74–8 by professionals surveyed.
Can’t hardly is a double negative and is rejected by 76 of 82 professionals. Hardly already carries a negative meaning, so can’t creates an illogical construction.
Grammar requires the predicate nominative she, yet “This is her” sounds unnatural. Unlike “It’s me” (fully established), “This is her” is still rejected by 57 of 82 educated speakers. Both choices feel awkward on the telephone.
Who is the normal, popular form as the first word of a sentence regardless of grammatical case. “Who are you waiting for?” accepted by 66 of 82 professionals. Insisting on whom in everyday speech sounds pompous to most educated ears.
When the pronoun is the subject of a following verb, use whoever, not whomever, even after a preposition. In “take care of whoever is waiting,” the pronoun is the subject of is waiting, not the object of of.
After the verb to be, the predicate requires the nominative form who, not whom. “Whom would you like to be?” misapplies whom out of excessive reverence for the form—both grammatically wrong and stylistically absurd.
To rob is to abscond with the contents of something (a person is robbed of their belongings). To steal is to take the thing itself. A purse is stolen; the owner is robbed.
A desert (one s) is a barren wasteland. A dessert (two s’s) is the sweet course after a meal. Memory aid: you want two portions of dessert, so it gets two s’s.